I Came To Sarasota For The Waters

Unconfirmed reports on unfounded rumors from unsubstantiated sources concocting preposterous innuendo

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Trick Or Treating In Sarasota; It's.........Different

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Because of the "mature" demographics of Sarasota, Halloween is celebrated a little differently. Differently, as in (if you ARE a t...
2 comments:
Friday, October 30, 2009

Yes, Virginia, There Is A Great Pumpkin--AND IT'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!

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Recently, I received this heartwarming note from little 8-year old Virginia Plumnelly of Poucher's Corner, FLA: Dear Mr. One-Eyed, I am ...
Thursday, October 29, 2009

Bombs Away On Longboat Key!

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The Army Corps of Engineers have been placing half-page ads in the Sarasota Herald-Tribune recently asking locals who have any knowledge or ...
Monday, October 26, 2009

The Emotional Consequences Of Falling In Love With A Married Woman: A Confession

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I can't believe this has happened to me. I've been married to a wonderful woman for close to 19 years, but, at a wedding we both att...
1 comment:
Sunday, October 25, 2009

Sarasota CSI Cracks "Knife In Sandwich" Case; Community Breathes Sigh Of Relief

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A team of highly-trained investigators from the Sarasota Police Department, working relentlessly around the clock to solve the biggest myste...
Saturday, October 24, 2009

North Port Harvest Fair Fireworks Cancelled Due To Accident

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The City of North Port's annual Harvest Festival fireworks display has been cancelled due to an untimely accident during a test shot by ...
6 comments:
Friday, October 23, 2009

Soupy Sales Takes His Final Pie, Toxicology Results Indicate Banana Cream

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Beloved entertainer and patron saint of pie lovers everywhere, Soupy Sales, died this past week in a New York City medical facility. Mr. Sa...
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One-Eyed Dick
The Culture Capital of FLA, The Sunshine/Funshine State, United States
I relocated to Sarasota several years ago. They said it was the promised land; paradise, if you will. But, like Rick Blaine observed when he was told that Casablanca was in the desert and had no water, "I was misinformed." Oh, there's water here, all right. It's just that it's filled with sharks, alligators, red tide, snakes, hurricanes, snobs, scammers and real estate developers, redneck crackers and the moneyed elite. Casablanca only had Nazis. Ha!
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