I Came To Sarasota For The Waters

Unconfirmed reports on unfounded rumors from unsubstantiated sources concocting preposterous innuendo

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Suncoast Rocked By Drug Arrest of Beloved Pie Lady, Amanda Yoder

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Sarasota awoke this morning to the stunning news that the revered Amish grandmother "Queen of Pies", 104-year old Amanda Yoder, wa...
4 comments:
Wednesday, October 27, 2010

International Sports Figure Dies Mysteriously; Was Being Investigated For Gambling Ties

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Internationally-famous sports prognosticator, Paul, the Octopus , has been found dead at his home in Germany. Paul's meteoric rise to ...
Monday, October 18, 2010

June Cleaver's Death Ruled "Suspicious"; Her Checkered Past Revealed

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The Los Angeles County Coroner, Dr. R. Quincy, M.E., has decided that there is enough evidence in the death of TV super-mom, June Cleaver, t...
1 comment:
Monday, October 11, 2010

Chilean Miners' Squabbling Jeopardizes Imminent Rescue

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The impending rescue of thirty-three trapped miners some 2,000 ft. below the surface of a forbidding desert landscape in Chile is apparently...
1 comment:
Sunday, October 10, 2010

Sarasota Realtors Demand Reparations For Hungarian Sludge Flood

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The Sarasota Association of Realtors, in conjunction with the Visitor's Bureau, the Chamber of Commerce and a loose consortium of local ...
Saturday, October 9, 2010

Glenn Beck Identifies Root of America's Ills--Hide The Children!!!

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Oh, don't look so startled.  We knew.  We all knew.  But it took a hero, a hero like Glenn Beck to say it out loud.  The self-styled...
2 comments:
Monday, October 4, 2010

Captain Obvious Tip o' the Day

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Dear Dan, The next time you tangle with a skunk, go unarmed .  Mano y mofeta , so to speak.  You don't need no stinkin' gun, h...
1 comment:
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One-Eyed Dick
The Culture Capital of FLA, The Sunshine/Funshine State, United States
I relocated to Sarasota several years ago. They said it was the promised land; paradise, if you will. But, like Rick Blaine observed when he was told that Casablanca was in the desert and had no water, "I was misinformed." Oh, there's water here, all right. It's just that it's filled with sharks, alligators, red tide, snakes, hurricanes, snobs, scammers and real estate developers, redneck crackers and the moneyed elite. Casablanca only had Nazis. Ha!
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