Monday, October 26, 2009

The Emotional Consequences Of Falling In Love With A Married Woman: A Confession

I can't believe this has happened to me.

I've been married to a wonderful woman for close to 19 years, but, at a wedding we both attended a few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to dance with a gorgeous recently-married young woman and realized that I am hopelessly head-over-heels in love with her.

I even told her so.

To my utter amazement, she said she loved me, too.


It started out so innocuously. I've known this girl for some time now and first met her, innocently enough, through my wife. Through the years, I've watched her mature into a very special woman; smart, self-assured, funny and blue eyes that branded her initials on my heart forever.

Now, I could feel my wife's eyes burning a hole in the back of my head watching the two of us dance, but it didn't matter. I almost think that everybody at the reception was watching us, but, for as long as I held her in my arms this night, we would shut out the rest of the world and our universe narrowed to become just the two of us.

I remember the first time I danced with her, appropriately at another wedding we both attended years ago. She didn't want to, but I coaxed her into it. Back then, she was just a shy girl with glasses; this time, she is a stunning beauty and I am putty in her hands as we sway to the music in the gentle evening breeze.

For that first dance together, she stood on my feet.

What makes this dance so special was that, about an hour ago, I had escorted her down the aisle and given her over to the man who was to be her new husband.

I am the father of this beautiful bride.

Technically, I am her step-father, but she's called me "Dad" ever since she was 5, when I married her mother.

We've been through the blending of families, births, deaths, birthday parties, weddings, vacations, Sat. afternoon roller-skating, zoo trips, 6th-grade choral concerts, walks in the woods, girlfriends, the slamming of doors, a keychain collection, slumber parties, homework I didn't know how to do, first dates, learning to drive, boy-band concerts, boyfriends, Christmases, moving to FLA, first jobs, baseball games, the boyfriend and now, her very own wedding.

I didn't think I would get so emotional about all of this. Sure, I got a little misty when the first notes of the Wedding March sounded our cue to start down the aisle, but I recovered and completed our solemn walk and made the handoff to the waiting groom without incident, successfully acquitting my father-of-the-bride duties at the ceremony.

But when the DJ began playing Little Miss Magic by Jimmy Buffett after calling the two of us to the dance floor, I knew I was in for it. The song, not a classic by any stretch of the imagination, was special to me because I remember singing it to her and her younger sister when they were just wee little girls. Try as I might to think about batting averages or yards-per-carry, I felt tears burn my cheeks as I held her close, this newly-married woman. She said she picked the song because it reminded her of me.

Of "us," actually.

Constantly amazed by the blades of the fan on the ceiling
The clever little glances she gives me can't help but be appealing
She loves to ride into town with the top down
Feel that warm breeze on her gentle skin
She is my next of kin

I see a little more of me everyday
I catch a little more moustache turning gray
Your mother is the only other woman for me
Little miss magic, what you gonna be?

Sometimes I catch her dreamin' and wonder where that little mind meanders
Is she strollin' along the shore or cruisin' oer the broad savannah
I know someday she'll learn to make up her own rhymes
Someday shes gonna learn how to fly
Oh, that I won't deny

I catch a little more dialogue comin my way
I see those big (blue) eyes just start to lookin' astray
Your mother's still the only other woman for me
Little miss magic, what you gonna be?

Yes, she loves to ride into town with the top down
Feel that warm breeze on her gentle skin
She is my next of kin

Constantly amazed by the blades of the fan on the ceiling
Those clever little looks she gives just cant help but be appealing
I know someday she'll learn to make up her own rhymes
One day shes gonna learn how to fly
That I won't deny

I see a little more of me everyday
I feel a little more moustache turning gray
Your mother's still the only other woman for me
Little miss magic, what you gonna be?
Little miss magic, what you gonna be?
Little miss magic, just can't wait to see

It's raining, it's pouring
Your old man is snoring

Through my tears, I could see her mother sobbing, holding the bride's younger sister, also sobbing. Later, I found out that my wife was going to suggest this very same song for this special dance, but did not want to infringe on the God-given right of the bride to select her own songs.

That's why I love her so--she's just like her mother!

At some point during the evening, her "real" dad, her biological father, shook my hand and thanked me for "taking over for him and raising his daughters" when he and my wife got divorced and he faded in and out of their lives.


In retrospect, I should have thanked him for allowing me the opportunity.

1 comment:

  1. That's beautiful, man. Congratulations Mr. One-eyed Father of the Bride.

    Salute!

    ReplyDelete