Monday, February 9, 2009

Police Find No Concealed Weapon

Naked man arrested after alleged attack

Published: Monday, February 9, 2009 at 1:00 a.m.

BRADENTON - Terry Sellers, 26, of the 4000 block of 27th Street West, was arrested Saturday afternoon after attacking three people, according to police.

The Manatee Sheriff's Office reported that Sellers and three others were at his home socializing when Sellers began making advances toward Amber Cooper, who was there with her boyfriend, Shawn Duncan.

The three started fighting, and another man, Michael Moskawitz, entered the house to find Sellers kicking Cooper. Moskawitz, who had been working on his car, hit Sellers in the head with a tire iron.

Sellers reportedly went to the bathroom to clean up, asking the others not to call the police. But after taking a shower, Sellers ran out of the bathroom naked and attacked the three others. They ran from the house and called police.

Deputies arrived at about 3:40 p.m. to find Sellers naked and "aggressive" in the front yard. He was taken to Manatee Memorial Hospital for treatment of a gash on his forehead and then taken to the county jail, where he remained Sunday on $2,200 bail.

Sellers faces three counts of aggravated battery.

Man, talk about a tough day. This guy invites some friends over to his pied-a-terre to discuss recurring existential themes in French literature and all hell breaks loose.

One of his guests, Amber Cooper, disagrees with her paramour, Shawn Duncan, about the importance that the work of author Albert Camus plays in their discussion and things get ugly. Sellers valiantly attempts to defuse the argument, but chaos ensues.

Then, another guy who was outside working on his Maserati hears the commotion and clobbers Sellers with a tire iron, like for no reason.

Always the good host, Sellers then excused himself and went to the bathroom to make sure he didn't get any blood on his new Gucci shirt.

He gets out of the shower and hears his three guests getting into his last box of Cheetos. He loves his Cheetos and rushes from the bathroom to stop them, whereupon they run from the house--with the Cheetos--and call the police.

The deputies arrive and find Sellers in his front yard, agitated, naked and bleeding from the head wound which has since re-opened. Despite his perfectly logical explanation of events, Sellers is hauled off to the slammer, where he is unable to post bail because his wallet is in his pants in the bathroom at home.

I'm sure someday they'll all look back on this comedy of errors and laugh........

Oh, and, yes, that probably will leave a mark.

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